RFG01 | Why Your New Year Resolutions Keep Failing (And How to Fix It) with Pastor Psychologist Patrick Obel

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What’s your new year’s resolution? Lose weight, make more money, have better relationships are the common resolutions. Most people have good intentions, but rarely follow through to achieving them. We have heard lots of information on goal setting and all the other ways we can achieve our goals, but the rate of completion is probably less than 10%. I want to go in-depth on what is really going on and what can be done to overcome these barriers to what we want to achieve.

In today’s episode, we discuss with Patrick Obel, a psychologist at the United States International University – Africa, about new year’s resolutions.

Some Topics We Discussed Include:

• The common pitfalls people face when setting goals, particularly at the start of a new year,
• Practical tools and strategies for overcoming these challenges like
• How to manage failure and
• How to view risk in goal setting.

Below are the show resources and the key discussion points

Listen to the Podcast! (And remember to leave us a review!)

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Show Resources

Download Wheel of life template

Key Discussion Points

The Importance of Self-Assessment

Dr. Obel encourages you to begin by assessing your satisfaction with the past year. Reflecting on areas where you feel unfulfilled and identifying necessary changes is crucial for setting realistic and meaningful goals. This self-assessment helps you understand your current state and what you need to focus on moving forward.

Actionable Steps:

• Reflect on the Past Year: Take time to think about what went well and what didn’t. Identify areas where you felt most and least satisfied.
• Identify Key Areas for Improvement: Pinpoint specific aspects of your life that need attention, such as career, relationships, or health.

Setting SMART Goals

The conversation shifts to the importance of setting SMART goals—Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Dr. Obel explains that breaking down larger aspirations into smaller, manageable tasks creates a clearer path toward objectives.

Actionable Steps:

• Specific: Define your goal clearly. Instead of saying, “I want to get fit,” specify, “I want to run a 5K in under 30 minutes.”
• Measurable: Ensure you can track your progress. For example, “I will run three times a week and increase my distance by 0.5 miles each week.”
• Achievable: Set realistic goals. If you’re new to running, don’t aim for a marathon right away.
• Relevant: Your goal should align with your broader life objectives. If health is a priority, running fits well.
• Time-bound: Set a deadline. “I will achieve this by June 30th.”

Dealing with Failure

Addressing the topic of failure, Dr. Obel emphasizes the importance of acknowledging setbacks. Recognizing that you did not achieve your goals and asking what could have been done differently transforms perceived failures into valuable learning experiences.

Actionable Steps:

• Reflect on Setbacks: When you encounter a failure, take time to understand what went wrong.
• Learn and Adjust: Use these insights to adjust your approach. If you missed a running session, identify why and plan to avoid similar issues in the future.

Starting Small

Dr. Obel advocates for starting small to minimize the fear of failure. Setting smaller, less intimidating goals increases the likelihood of taking action.

Actionable Steps:

• Break Down Goals: Instead of aiming to lose 50 pounds, start with a goal to lose 5 pounds in the first month.
• Celebrate Small Wins: Acknowledge and celebrate each small achievement to build momentum.

Understanding Risk

The discussion also touches on the concept of risk and how it influences goal achievement. Dr. Obel defines risk as the potential pain associated with not achieving a goal. Shifting the mindset to consider positive possibilities cultivates a more optimistic outlook.

Actionable Steps:

• Assess Risks and Rewards: Understand the potential downsides and upsides of your goals.
• Focus on Positives: Concentrate on the benefits of achieving your goals rather than the fear of failure.

The Power of Focus

Dr. Obel highlights the significance of focus in achieving goals. Concentrating on elements that contribute to success increases the likelihood of positive outcomes.

Actionable Steps:

• Maintain a Positive Focus: Keep your attention on what you need to do to succeed rather than potential obstacles.
• Visualize Success: Regularly visualize achieving your goals to reinforce positive thinking.

Practical Applications

Throughout the episode, Dr. Obel provides practical examples of how you can apply these concepts in your life. He discusses various business opportunities, such as starting a small stationery supply business or becoming a broker for construction materials.

Actionable Steps:

• Identify Opportunities: Look for small, manageable business ideas that align with your skills and interests.
• Take Incremental Steps: Start with a small project to test the waters before committing to larger ventures.

The Wheel of Life

The episode concludes with a discussion of the “wheel of life” as a valuable tool for achieving balance. This framework allows individuals to evaluate different aspects of their lives—such as career, relationships, physical health, academics, spirituality, financial health, recreation, mental well-being and personal growth—and identify areas that may require more attention.

Actionable Steps:

• Create Your Wheel of Life: Draw a circle and divide it into segments representing different life areas (career, health, relationships, etc.).
• Rate Your Satisfaction: Rate your satisfaction in each segment on a scale of 1 to 10.
• Identify Imbalances: Look for areas with low ratings and set goals to improve them.

Parting Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, Dr. Obel emphasizes that success is attainable for you if you focus on taking action. He encourages you to start small, remain positive, and be open to learning from your experiences. The conversation serves as a reminder that while the journey toward achieving goals may be fraught with challenges, it is also filled with opportunities for growth and fulfillment.

In summary, this episode of “Revenge of the Forsaken Gods” offers valuable insights into the art of goal setting and the psychological barriers that often hinder progress. Through self-assessment, the establishment of SMART goals, and a focus on positive outcomes, you can navigate your path toward success with greater confidence and clarity.

Thanks for tuning into this week’s episode of the Revenge of the forsaken gods Podcast! If the information in our weekly conversations and interviews have helped you in your business journey, please head over to iTunes, subscribe to the show, and leave us an honest review. Your reviews and feedback will not only help us continue to deliver great, helpful content, but it will also help us reach even more amazing entrepreneurs just like you!

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Tagged as: Patrick Obel, personal development, psychologist, Andrew Balongo Opere, revengepobel, challenges, storytelling, coaching, USIU, communication, goal setting, new year, new years resolutions, pastor.